If you ask people to describe networking you will get a variety of responses, most often it sounds something like this, “going to events where business people exchange business cards and talk business with one another.”  While indeed that is a good description of what a lot of “networking” events look like, it is not the only way that networking takes place.  People get so hung up on the formal side of networking that they completely miss all the other opportunities to network.  I personally spend far less time at “networking events” and far more time networking in ways that I enjoy.

Recently, I was invited to be part of #Social46.  This is a group of social media minded people who have strong networks, they were asked to support the Super Bowl 2012 committee in welcoming guest and helping them out using social media.  I was honored to be asked, and took advantage of the opportunity. Many of these are people I have heard of but never met in person, some I knew and have relationships with and still others I have never met online or offline.  This is the kind of networking that I enjoy, a group of people bound together for a common cause.

It does not take long to build strong relationships with people who have a common cause because you are all working and supporting one another to achieve that cause.  For this group there was the added excitement of being able to connect the city and the visitors, and being the first city to ever fully use social media in such a large event. I have a strong affinity for many of the participants, they are my role models on Social Media, and they are so giving of their time and efforts.  These are the kind of people I want in my network, who I want to learn more about, and who I feel good about referring to others because their “Givers Gain” attitude make them so referrable.

Working with a small group of people for a common cause is often far more effective that going month after month to big “networking” events.  Take a look a the networking that you are doing, how are you breaking out of the traditional mode and finding new ways to connect and build relationships?  Share some of your ideas with us!

 Last week I posted 3 Things that Women Do Better Than Men, today it is the guys turn. Can you believe it ladies, there are things that men do better than we women. Of course you can, it is designed by nature. Men are great at doing a variety of things while women are great at others, we are different in every aspect of business and life. In this case we are going to look at 3 things that men do better at networking that women do.

 The goal is for us to learn how to network with men and leverage our networks more effectively. Women are great at building strong long term relationship. Where we are weak is taking those relationships and turning them in to business opportunities, for referrals and even sales. Here are 3 things that men do better and we can learn to do it too.

1.  They can identify business opportunities quicker than women. Men can see opportunity and they are willing to go after in much quicker. In the world of networking, men can identify where they are most likely to be able to get and give referrals with someone.

2. They are more willing to ask for what they want. Their fear of rejection is much less than a woman’s fear of rejection. They are not afraid to ask people to do things for them, and they are clear about what they want and approach people in business with that in mind.

3. Men are much better at not taking things personally, they understand that it is about the business. They can have the business deal go bad and they know it should not get in the way of their friendship.

 These are great traits for women to be able to do also. My next post will discuss how we can benefit by learning from each other. What kinds of thing have you noticed about the differences in men and women networking?

I love to help people be more successful with their networking activities.  Most of us are networking because we are looking for more referrals for our business.  Unfortunately over time people come to realize that it takes more than meeting, greeting, and exchanging cards.

Here is a list of common issues that business people have around generating referrals for their business.  This is not a complete list, but does cover many of the issues.

• I spend more time networking than following up on referrals.
• I find that I give a lot of referrals to people but get very little in return.
• I don’t know the right place to networker.
• I don’t know the right time to ask a person for a referral.
• I get a lot of low level leads that do not amount to business.
• I often don’t have time to follow up on the referrals I am given.
• I tell a lot of people what I do, the they just don’t seem to understand.
• I don’t attend networking events because I really don’t know what to do when I am there.
• I feel like I have a lot of visibility but it is not leading to referrals.
• I don’t know the value of an appointment.
• I try to build a power team but no one follows through.
• Following up after a networking event often falls through the crack.
• I cannot figure out why some people will not refer business to me.
• I don’t know exactly who is in my contact sphere.
• I don’t know who I want my next customer to be.
• My database is unorganized and not sortable.
• I would rather just make friends and hope they buy from me.
• My referral partners do not participate at the same level I do.
• I don’t know how to qualify a referral for others in my network.
• When I have a one to one it becomes too social.
• When I get a referral, it often does not convert to business.
• I cannot get my fellow network members to educate me how to refer them.
• I am not sure how to educate my network.
• I am spending too much of my time with low value prospects.
• I cannot get clarity around my target market.
• My referrals are unpredictable.
• When I get a referral, I am often disappointed in the quality of it.
• I spend too much time working on my network versus in my network.
• I don’t understand the six steps of the referral process or if I am missing any of them.
• I don’t understand how to move a person into a  proactive referral relationship.
• I get some referrals from my clients but that is about it.
• I know I need more business by referral and I just don’t know where to start.
• I am confused about the role that Social Media plays in my network.
• My company has offered reward for referrals, yet get few of any quality.

Building your business by referral is Simple, but it is Not Easy.

Since time is limited, it is necessary that women make the best use of networking time. Men in general have more time to network and connect with others in the business world, so women need to leverage the time they have. Our study shows that the more time a person spends networking the more successful they are, therefore if a woman is limited by her life style on the number of hours she can network, she will also be limited in how successful she will be  at getting results from her network. Her only alternative is to find better ways to utilize the time she has. And to find groups that fit her and her families life. Predominately that has been groups that meet mid-day since morning and evenings have a tendency to be family and social time.

For most business professionals there is a great deal of time spent running from one networking event to the next, meeting more and more new people in hopes that we will sell a product or service to someone in the room. It takes a lot of time, and becomes frustrating to women when they find themselves behind the eight ball because they cannot make so many meetings. If you stop and take a look at quality networking over quantity networking you will find that as a busy mom and business owner you can have a positive result from your activities.
Networking is the activity of going out and meeting people face to face, adding new people to your Rolodex and often pitching your product or service to the people in the room or having their products and services pitched to you. This is not an effective use of the valuable time that women have,  if indeed it is our desire to create credibility and profitability.

Networking is an important activity and needs to be planned in advance,  how much time you are going to spend and what event you are going to attend. For most women being able to get our business act ivies and family act ivies on the same calendar will allow us to manage all of our options. Once we decide what events or functions we are going to attend we can then set goals for what we want to accomplish while we are there.

More effective planning will allow everyone to make good use of their time spent networking.  Look at your calendar and your contacts, and plan accordingly.

I love to blog, but I have been inconsistent over the last year because I have been working on a major book project that has taken 4 years of research, and 12,000 people surveyed. This book, Business Networking and Sex, has been under deadline with the publisher so all my writing time has been taken up working to meet those deadlines.

Whenever I thought about blogging I would start to feel guilty for not working on the book. After all it is a very exciting project, but the book goes to the publisher this May 1, and I am very excited. Both to turn the book into the publisher but also to get back to blogging.

My personal blog is going to take a bit of a change, with a new look from Roundpeg and a wider variety of topics. I hope you will enjoy the blog, leave some feed back, ask some questions or even challenge my thinking!

It’s good to be back!

In this post we look at the third step of the referral process. Without step three there is no referral, you cannot pass a referral if you cannot identify a persons need. In step three, you teach your network members how to identify the need for your product or services.   Few people ever teach this part of the process to their network members. They assume that if they pass enough knowledge about what they do and how they do it, people will pass them referrals.  If you stop at steps one and two you will only receive leads or reactive referrals.  While reactive referrals are good, they cannot be predicted and depend on.  Reactive referrals required a lot of “If’s” for them to happen.

If someone calls me and ask me who I know that can fix their car, and if I can remember to pass your information on, and if they pick up the phone and call you, then you get business.  Companies pay a lot of money to develop top of mind thinking for just this kind of business. Companies like Nike, Coke and Budwiser.  Word of mouth works, it brings this kind of business in and you can make a living doing it.   But, it will not get you proactive, predictable, high value referred prospects.  For that to happen your network must understand how to identify need on your behalf.   What questions can they ask their clients when they are talking to them, what might be happening in their lives that will trigger your network to ask the questions.  What pain do fix for your customers and how will you teach that to your network members?

The more you teach your network the higher the quality referrals you will receive from them.

The Second step of the referral process is the smallest of all the steps, because it is the easiest of the five steps and one that most people are comfortable doing. That step is Knowledge. If your referral partners or power team members are going to pass you referrals they need to have knowledge of you, your business and how you do business. Who are your ideal clients and how do you help them.

Passing on the knowledge of your business is a pretty common practice. Go to most any networking event and you will hear everyone talking about their business. How they do it, where they do it and who they do it for. If you are going to get good referrals you have to follow each step in order.

When you give a bunch of information to someone you have not taken the time to build trust or credibility with it becomes wasted effort. They have a lot of information but they are not likely to pass you referrals. They will give you leads and information but they are not going to pass you the quality referrals you are looking for.  Passing knowledge of your to others creates word of mouth and/or visibility in the market place but is not the sources of referrals.

Take time on step one, build trust. Once you have done that, it is time to teach your referral partners and power teams members about your business.

There are 5 Steps to the referral process, as identified by the Referral Institute and Dr. Ivan Misner.  Each step is important and no step can be skipped,  if what you want are high level referrals that close into quality business. The biggest complaint that that I hear from is they are getting leads or nothing at all. I hear over and over how this organization or that one did not work because they only got leads that turned in to low value business or no business at all.   Blaming the organization for the lack of referrals is not productive, it all starts with you. Until you recognize that you cannot change the outcome.   Getting Referrals has little to do with the organization and everything to do with implementing the 5 Steps.

Each of the 5 Steps require a post of their own, so this is the beginning of the series of 7 articles.

Here are the 5 Steps to getting high value referrals from your network.

1. Trust, this is the biggest step and often the hardest.

2. Knowledge, a very small step, easy to achieve.

3. Need, is rarely if ever trained to referral sources.

4. Solution, you are the solution to the need but do your referral sources know how offer your solution?

5. The appointment, is the last and final step to teach, how do you want to be referred.

Each step is important and each step must be accomplished flawlessly. Unfortunately, no time or little time is spent on these steps and most people don’t even recognize that there is a system. So, stay tuned for the next 6 post, we will look at each of the steps in detail!

Every now and then it bites us in the back side, and when it does we are often upset that we are being judged unfairly but it is our reputation so we have to take responsibility for it both personally and professionally.

Today more than ever those two reputations have a tendency to run together. There was a time that your private life was private or stayed within a very small community of people who knew you.

Not true today, millions of people are on at least one social networking sights and often on multiple sights such as Linkedin, Facebook, Twitter and Blogs. Not including all of the information that can be found out about a person by simply Googling their names. It is harder than ever to protect our reputation personally and professionally.

Today more than every it is imperative that you manage your reputation.  Be cautious about what you post online, be aware of what others are posting about you and your business.  If you are not on Facebook, Twitter, or other sites, then you need to find a way of monitoring these sights.  You can destroy your reputation, but it can also be destroyed by others.  Do you know what is being said to you and about you?

I know of many examples where friends have been denied a job based on information the employer has gotten via the internet, and business has been lost because the business owner has taken some very controversial stands in a very public way,

It is your reputation, hard to build, easy to destroy.  What are you doing to protect it?

How are you making deposits into your referral sources relationship bank account? Nurturing the relationships that you are developing takes time and effort; relationships do not spring up over night. They must be nurtured and cared for. There are many things that you can do to help move your relationships to a higher level.

Collaboration is an excellent way to build trust and support for one another. Collaborating creates a reliable and committed source of information, support, and referrals and helps you achieve your goals more easily and quickly.

Here is a list of things you can collaborate on that supports each person.

1. Write a newsletter. Each person can write an article with their by lines. This is a great way to support one another using collaboration and makes the work of a newsletter much easier.

2. Put together a seminar or training event. Real Estate Agents and Mortgage Brokers often do seminars for first time homebuyers together.

3. Co-host a social event that brings together the clients and contacts of both of the collaborative partners. Golf outings, parties, and many other types of events are good for this tactic.

4. Collaborate on a Fundraising event that supports a common charity.

Here are some important steps to remember if you are going to collaborate;

• Decide on what kinds of resources you need to obtain – information, support, or referrals
• Meet to discuss the type of partnership, your needs and resources, and their needs and resources.
• Frame an informal agreement on how the partnership will work – what resources you will share, how you will share them, and for how long.
• Make sure that both parties are equally committed to the work and the outcome of the project.

Done correctly collaboration is a powerful way to support one another, grow the relationship and make major deposits in the relationship bank account.